STOP Bullying, How-To: Listen Parents !!! and Everybody Else.

What’s a permanent solution?

Bullying is quite a common problem not just among kids, teens, at workplace, in relationships, with strangers, you name it. How to deal with it?

A frustrated school-going kid asked this question to his teacher.

The awe — answer given applies to any age group.

Teaching is a noble profession, only when teacher is noble. Sometimes, their advice is like a life-time asset. I like to share one such incident.

Kid: So, my question is like in school um my name is Jacob by the way and it’s and in school like some people tease my name…like the Christian way in German and then they call it purposely and then also like tease my culture which really hurts me sometimes and...um sometimes if I’m annoyed and (kid started swinging his head and stopped explaining)…………ha..ha…ha….

Teacher: I really want to know NOW…ha..ha…ha….

Kid: like I, I don’t physically hurt them [applause in the hall…ha..ha…ha….] like, I’m just like, please don’t do this, like it hurts me a lot but then they still go on. What should I do then?

Teacher: Thank you for your question young man it takes a lot of courage to ask that questions…um… first of all, I think that ….um… bullying is not okay. A school is a place where children should feel safe and should be safe from any kind of prejudice. You guys are German tax paying citizens. You have a right to give your children a healthy education and if your children are going to school, they have a right not to be bullied and to be mistreated.

So I think …uh.. parents whose children are being mistreated in that way, parents should really seriously take it up with the school administration and fight for the safety and protection of their kids. I think that’s a fundamental thing we should do. We shouldn’t just do that for our own children. We should do it for every child. that’s not just something we should do for our own kids that oh they’re biased. No child should be treated unfairly or mistreated. Even verbal abuse is a kind of abuse now.

So, one thing is, you know, you should tell your teacher about this. You should tell your parents about this. They should talk and maybe they should have a conversation with the parents of those kids who should really know better.

Other than that young man you’re goanna face lots of situations where there’s going to be people that are going to say stupid things, okay.

When you meet people that are acting ignorantly then just walk away peacefully. You don’t have to deal with people like that, right?

So, when they say whatever Twist of your name then you just act like you don’t even hear it.

Because you know, what deal such people like that, we call them trolls. You know what they need, they need your attention and the more you look like you got hurt the more they do it. The more you act like they don’t even exist, then they get angry.

You have to learn to change the game instead of you being the one who’s angry. They should be the one being angry. Then, they’ll say well that didn’t work. Let me act even more stupid and then let me actually rewards to it. Let them make a fool of themselves but the more you show that you’re being hurt or it’s affecting you the more it encourages them to act in that way, you understand?

There are some people who don’t like me very much. They say things. I don’t say anything. They say more things, but I’ll don’t say anything then they get really angry, honestly.

What’s in their head? “He is still happy”, because I don’t say anything.

The best thing you can give them is your attention. That’s the best gift you can give them. They don’t deserve that gift.

We should try harder but the comment I’ll make to the rest of you is — I had to learn this the hard way for myself. Look, human beings, we have limited energy in the day, yes, or no? ….. physically, and at some point, our body says enough — fall asleep.

The same way you have limited emotional space. You have limited emotional space. You can use and you have limited Reserve in your heart. You have to decide where to use it. I decided a long time ago some people are not worth any space in here. So, they’re not worth my anger, they’re not worth my frustration, they’re not worth me thinking about them.

Because if I give them mental space, they’re living rent free in my head and there if I’m giving them part of my life, my anger, I’m spending something on them. That’s too expensive. My emotions are too expensive to spend on this useless person. What have they given me that I should spend on them.

I would rather use this space. I have this limited space that I have to invest on myself or on people who are worth it but not on anyone who’s not worth it. You have to decide.

You may have such people in your own family. Sometimes that has been happening for years, they’ve been, they’ve been…. saying mean things to you. Every time they say anything to you, you’re like, I can’t believe they said that — it hurts me so much. Eventually, you have to learn.

Hey, you know what — I’m the one giving them the space. I’m the one allowing them to let me get angry.

I need to stop giving them this space because they clearly don’t deserve it. It’s better spent somewhere else then it’s because at some point it’s not even their fault anymore. They’re doing what they’re doing. Now it’s your fault for allowing it to hurt. You have to develop that kind of mentality.

Never argue with stupid people. They will drag you down to their level and beat you with experience. — Mark Twain

You know, sometimes these people belong in the Inner Circle and sometimes these people belong in the outsides.

You have to push… push some people to the outside sometimes.

You have to learn the pattern, then learn — how to get lost in something more meaningful without carrying that emotional baggage. Different types of people have different mindsets. If you are able to manage situations, you are basically learning one of the aspects of leadership.